Living life without regrets.
Thats my personal mantra, as you know.
All these times with you has given me 2 regrets,

The first is as you know, me keeping that outing a secret from you.
I realised i destroyed everything we fought and tried so hard to build up since day 1.
Sometimes you just make so much sense, that i think you were brought into my life to knock some into mine.
I could have just told you who i was going out with, the purpose and all this could have been avoided. You would have made your concerns known to me, but all in all things would have been fine. Just writing about how i feel and thinking back about the situation makes me feel damn stupid. You have every right to be angry, its understandable. I've always said that a relationship should be built on mutual trust. Doing what i did, i contradicted everything that i expected from you. A million sorries wouldn't justify you nor me. I just hope that you can learn to trust me again, really hope so. This incident like i said was a one off, won't happen again.

Now on to the second regret that i have.
Remember when we were listening to "Ai Wo Bie Zou". You said that if i had played that song for you, you would have stayed. That line "you would have stayed" haunts my every waking or sleeping second. No seriously i dreamt that i actually sang that song to you and you told me that you'd stay. I went home that day, i started learning how to play that song. As i strummed every single note, sung every word to you my emotions threatened to get the better of me. How you would have stayed if i had just bothered to be selfish at that point of time. Im trying to write another song, to make amends but the words just aren't coming. I've always said that i can deal with you leaving, but the truth is everytime i try to pen that new song, i can't bear to write down my thoughts onto paper. Its that painful for me, to know that this magical fantasy we've created for each other has to take a hiatus for 2 years, or more...
You've made me so damn happy, sad, angry every emotion that ever exists. You're that something i've been looking for my entire life.

I'm writing this on your new laptop which i painstakingly brought back from funan after just 3 hours of sleep. tired as hell miss you like crazy.

I dream so that i can be with you every hour of the day. =)
Written in green the colour that i've come to love.

Compared to friendship, gold is dirt. .
- 9:31 AM

I enjoyed the conversation, i wish you'd open up more to me.

Compared to friendship, gold is dirt. .
- 10:52 AM